Recently, a friend told me about an experience she had as she bid her final farewells to her late grandfather. In the midst of her own grief, she watched her mother face a very painful separation from a beloved family member. Yet from the church to the grave, she stood by her mother, as she had for so many years in the past. As the casket began its descent to the cold ground below, she held her mother even closer, determined to support her as she crossed this difficult threshold. All of the sudden, a group of mourners, who seemed to have pushed their way through the crowd, rushed to her mother’s side, in an attempt to offer their sympathies. My friend was practically put to the side at a moment in her and her mother’s life that was quite delicate and very difficult. Although I have no doubt the intentions of the individuals were genuine, their timing and manner of bringing comfort, in my opinion, were somewhat unfitting.
I read an L.A. Times article last week about the frustration some Haitian-Americans are feeling about their role in the recovery efforts of their homeland. Many wonder when they will be able to offer the consolation and help they know their Motherland desperately needs at this time and are baffled in how limited the opportunities they have to do so. “Because we’re Haitian, we want to be involved,” one woman said. “We have to be involved”, she emphasized.
I was glad to see the L.A. Times address this issue, and a bit relieved that I was not the only one who had been thinking about this. One of the main principles of community development focuses on the importance of asking questions. Questions are important when you work in a community, but who you ask is even more important. The answers you need are often best answered by the community itself. And any problems that are identified are best addressed when the solutions come from the community as well.
This is why, at times, I’ve cringed in the past few weeks as I’ve watched various reports coming from Haiti. Don’t get me wrong, I applaud the quick response of many individuals to the crisis, but I am baffled by the fact that some news agencies have not taken the time to really tap into the wealth of professionals who specialize in the specific issues of Haiti. They are out there. Perhaps their input could lead to a more productive conversation towards the resolution of long-standing problems in the country.
I continue to be touched by the love being shown to Haiti during such a critical hour in its life story. I’m just concerned for the few who are rushing in, many with good intentions, but predisposed with their ideas on how to create a new Haiti. Such an approach leaves key players on the sidelines, similar to what my friend experienced as she attempted to support her mother in a period of deep loss. I would simply encourage individuals, new organizations, and the media to just ask. Ask Haitians and those who have had an established presence in Haiti what the country needs. Continue to support the solutions that are generated from the community. Without a doubt, there are many around the world needed for Haiti’s rebuilding. This includes her children, both natives and in the diaspora, who long to comfort and restore their Motherland.
